As I type this Bruce and Tyler are watching Avatar again, and reciting it word for word. In fact, they’re anticipating the next line and beating the blu ray to it. Dang it. Now Trygg’s joining them but he’s not doing the voice over. He’s saying what the picture is going to do next. Seriously boys. What’s the point of watching it if your going to talk each other through the whole darn thing? This is what I’m hearing:
Bruce: “Run! Definitely!”
Trygg: “He’s going to start running and that’s going to start chasing him. She’s going to say ‘run definitely’!”
Tyler: “Run! Definitely!”
The movie: (voice of Sigourney Weaver) “Run! Definitely!”
Tyler: “Bam Yo! I told you!”
Tyler and Bruce fist bump like it was a total shock they got it right. Lord have mercy on me…where is my headset?!
I digress. The other day I realized the boys hadn’t been picking up the dog poop in the yard. Sure that seems like a small dilemma; but have you seen my dog? When I uttered my inspirational message as to why they needed to go out and clean it all up not a single one of them moved. I had to up the stakes for them. Darn it these kids require me to be creative and think outside the box sometimes. No worries though…I live outside the box. In fact, I don’t like the box at all..it’s so square and restricting..makes me feel limited and Lord knows I can’t stand any of that. So, it seems only natural that my children are the same way.
For the record, Tyler and Bruce are now arguing over the fact that Tyler can recite the lines better than Bruce. They need a life.
So, I asked the boys one last time to go clean up the dog poop. Nothing (of course). Fine, I can play this game too.
“Hey boys get your shoes on. I have a huge surprise for you!” I said sounding crazy pumped.
They all ran and got their shoes on and waited by the door. The wrong door in fact. So, while they were out front thinking we were jumping in the car heading off on an awesome adventure; I was getting poop bags ready by the other door. 🙂 Being a mom is so fun sometimes. I called for them again: “Boys are you coming?!” They come trotting around the corner and see me standing by the front door with a handful of poop bags ready to rock and roll. I have a Cheshire Cat sized grin on my face to show them my enthusiasm (really it was because I was totally pleased with how easily I had duped them).
Let the moaning and groaning begin. A few threats later and they were all three standing outside the front door with poop bags in hand. So I sweetened the news a bit with this: “So you boys are going to have a contest. Whoever collects the most bags of dog poop gets a trip to Big Dip.” Trey and Trygg were instantly ready to begin. You offer food AND ice cream and those two go nuts. Tyler on the other hand…not so much. So I added (have to be fair you know): “Tyler and Trey must tie their bags shut and Trygg can set his here in a nice line. You must have more than one little turd in your bag for it to count.”
And they were off! They collected an insane amount of poop. A part of me wonders if they cleaned up the poop in the neighbor’s yard too. Not likely, but wow…that was a lot of poop.
So here’s the CCC (crap collecting counts):
Tyler: 2 bags
Trey: 14 bags
Trygg: 17 bags
Total: 33 bags of crap.
Did you read that?! 33 bags of crap was collected in our yard. What the heck are we feeding this dog??? 33 bags!!! Man…I pity the garbage man when he collects our trash this week. Just a big bag of crap for a guy with a crappy job.
And yes, I took everyone to Big Dip. We’re all winners in the crap game. He he he! 😉
As for the movie…Trygg is now competing with Tyler to get the words out before the movie. When they do it correctly they both jump up and point at Bruce while making some annoying “in your face” kind of noise and gesture. I think I’m going to bed. These guys are far too exciting for me.